I've noticed that the way we respond to things on the massage table can sometimes mirror how we navigate the rest of our lives.
How often do we stay quiet when the pressure is a little too much? When we're cold, the bolster could move up slightly, or would really love to adjust our body? Sometimes, rather than asking for what we need, we convince ourselves that it's not a big deal or that we don't want to be difficult.
I've caught myself doing this, too. When I'm receiving a massage, I might notice that the table warmer is a little too hot or too cold, yet hesitate to ask for it to be adjusted. It's such a small request, but I can find myself thinking twice before speaking up.
This is something I want every person who gets on my table to know: You are always welcome to speak up. More pressure, less pressure, a cooler room, a warmer table, a change in positioning, or even a moment to pause. You will never hurt my feelings by communicating what you need.
My goal is for you to have the best experience possible. I can't always know exactly what you're feeling or what your body needs, so your feedback is an important part of making that happen. Massage is collaborative. This is an hour or so dedicated to you, and you deserve to feel comfortable asking for what would make that time more supportive.
I also think this can be a reflection of something much bigger. How often do we override our own discomfort to avoid inconveniencing someone else? How often do we minimize our preferences, hold back our opinions, or say yes when we'd really rather say no?
Sometimes, asking for something as simple as a temperature adjustment is an opportunity to practice something bigger: listening to ourselves and allowing our needs to matter.
This is also something we explore in somatic coaching. We work on becoming more aware of what's happening internally, recognizing our patterns and responses, and building the capacity to respond in ways that feel more aligned with what we actually need. It's one thing to recognize that something doesn't feel right; it's another to feel comfortable expressing that.
Consider this your reminder that your needs aren't an inconvenience. You don't have to wait until something becomes unbearable to speak up, and you don't have to justify every preference you have.
The next time you're on my table, let me know what you need. I'd much rather make an adjustment than have you spend your session wishing something were different.
And perhaps you can take that same permission with you when you leave.
