Resting but Still Exhausted? A Somatic Perspective on Why That Happens
“I’m resting, but I still feel tired.”
This is something I hear often — both in massage sessions and in conversation. And it’s an experience that can feel confusing or even discouraging, especially when you’re doing everything you’re “supposed” to do to take care of yourself.
I want to start by normalizing it.
Rest doesn’t always equal restoration. You can be lying down, taking time off, or sleeping more — and still feel depleted. Often, that’s not a failure of rest, but a nervous system that hasn’t fully downshifted yet.
When the body stays “on”
When the body has been in go-mode for a long time — managing stress, responsibility, stimulation, or emotional load — it can stay alert even during moments of rest. Muscles may soften, but the system underneath is still bracing.
In these moments, the body isn’t asking for more effort or better rest routines. It’s often asking for signals of safety and support.
This is where a somatic lens can be helpful. Instead of asking, “How do I rest better?” we might ask, “What does my body need in order to feel safe enough to truly settle?”
What can help the nervous system unwind
Small, gentle supports can make a meaningful difference, especially when they help the body orient to the present moment.
Some examples:
Letting your body feel supported underneath you (bed, couch, floor, or massage table)
Orienting to your environment — noticing the room, the light, or sounds around you
Slowing the exhale, even slightly
Receiving touch that isn’t asking anything of you
These kinds of cues help the nervous system shift out of constant alertness and into a state where restoration becomes possible.
Where massage and somatic coaching fit in
This is one of the reasons both hands-on work and somatic coaching can feel so deeply restorative.
Massage offers physical support through touch, helping muscles soften while also communicating safety to the nervous system. Somatic coaching offers a different kind of support — a space to slow down, tune into the body, and notice what’s happening beneath the surface, without needing to fix or push anything.
Both approaches work with the body rather than trying to override it. Over time, this can help the nervous system relearn how to settle, not just during sessions, but in everyday life as well.
A gentle reframe
If you’re resting but still tired, nothing is wrong with you. Your body may simply be asking for a different kind of support — one that meets you where you are, rather than asking you to do more.
Listening to that request, even softly, is already a meaningful step.
If you’d like support exploring this — whether through massage, somatic coaching, or a combination of both — I’d love to work with you.
