“Something in Me Feels Anxious”: A Gentler Way to Be With Difficult Emotions

When we’re experiencing something intense, we often say it like this:
I’m anxious. I’m overwhelmed. I’m angry.

That language makes sense. It’s familiar. And it often reflects how strongly the feeling is moving through us.

In somatic work, though, we sometimes experiment with a slightly different way of naming what’s happening.

Instead of saying “I’m anxious,” we might say:
“Something in me feels anxious.”

I’ll be honest — when I was first introduced to this kind of disidentification language, it felt weird. Clunky. Almost forced. There were moments when I didn’t want to disidentify from the feeling. It felt important. Personal. Sometimes even protective.

But over time, as I practiced with it more, I started to feel how powerful it could be.

This small shift in language creates just a bit of space between who we are and what we’re experiencing. The feeling doesn’t disappear. It isn’t minimized or bypassed. Instead, it becomes something we can be with — rather than something that completely takes us over.

Compare the difference between:

• I am anxious

• I am overwhelmed

• I am angry

and:

• Something in me feels anxious

• A part of me feels overwhelmed

• There’s anger here right now

For me, this shift has made it possible to explore difficult emotions with more curiosity and less overwhelm. The emotion is still present, but it’s no longer the whole of me. There’s more room to breathe, to notice, and to stay grounded.

This doesn’t mean we should always speak this way — or that emotions need to be softened or distanced from. Sometimes naming “I’m anxious” feels honest and right. Other times, especially when emotions feel intense or consuming, creating a little separation can help us stay regulated enough to listen.

If you’re curious, you might gently experiment with this the next time something strong arises. Notice how it feels in your body to name the experience without becoming it. Even noticing resistance to the language is information.

This kind of spacious, compassionate awareness is central to how I approach somatic coaching and body-based work — meeting what’s here without forcing it to change.

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